AAAAAHHHHH! Amazing Adventures of the Marauders!
by where-my-heart-resides
Summary: AU. The marauders are at Hogwarts, and trust me, it'll be a very interesting seven years. R&R!
1. An interesting year

**OH THE POSSIBILITIES!**

Yo, peeps! I decided that this chapter was too hard to read, all scrunched up, so, I redid it! It's the exact same chappie, only much easier to read! Read and review!

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It was a warm summer day in August.

The 31st of August to be exact.

Eleven year old Lily Evans was waiting excitedly in her living room. It was early in the morning, so nobody was up yet.

Lily was already dressed, and reading to go. You may be wondering why a little girl was up and ready at the crack of dawn. Well, it all started a month ago.

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"MOM!" 12 year old Petunia screamed. "Lily's doing it again!"

Her mother looked up from the dining room table to see Petunia's papers flying all over the place.

"Lily, stop that. Go up to your room and cool down a little bit" Mrs. Evans said to her youngest daughter.

"Mum, I can't help it. She called me a freak and I got angry, and this happened." Lily replied.

"Well, I don't know how or why this happens to you, but we'll need to find a reason."

Just then an owl flew through the window, and landed next to Lily. Lily tentatively picked up the animal, and saw a piece of parchment attached to it's leg.

She untied the parchment, and began to read.

No more then 30 seconds later, she dropped the parchment in surprise.

She picked it back up, reread it and the put it down. Then, Lily looked up at her mother, and spoke these words.

"Mum, this letter says that I'm a witch, and that I've been accepted to a school called Hogwarts."

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It was now one month later, and Lily was getting ready to board the train.

She had already bought all of her things at this odd little wizard town, called Diagon Alley.

She was so excited that she could barely contain herself.

Eventually, her parents came down and after a while longer they left for King's Cross. When they arrived, Lily looked at her ticket for the first time.

"9 and ¾?" she asked, to nobody in particular. "There is no such thing as 9 and ¾…."  
But when she turned around her parents were gone.

"My father says that I'll love Hogwarts, I wonder what house I'll be in…"

Hearing this, Lily whirled around. She thought she had heard Hogwarts. She spotted the boy who said it, and followed him. When he stopped, she began to speak.

"Hello, my name is Lily Evans, and I was wondering how you get onto platform 9 and ¾?"

She looked at him, for a second. The boy had extremely messy brown hair, and hazel eyes. He was somewhat tall, and looked like he was in good shape. 

The other boy had chin length shaggy, black hair, and had an air of mystery surrounding him. The boy with the messy brown hair, smirked at her before answering.

"James Potter, and this is Sirius Black. I'm guessing that your muggle born. Of course we'll show you how to get onto the platform." As he said this a maniacal glint shone in his eyes.

Lily thanked him and he began to speak again.

"Ok, come stand here, right next to the barrier, and…"

Unfortunately Lily didn't get to hear the rest of his words, as he pushed her hard in to a brick wall.

Well, Lily would have yelled at him, except for she got a bit of a shock because, at that moment she fell right through the wall, and onto the platform.

Lily picked herself up off the ground and looked around for Potter. Her trunk was next to her, but James was nowhere in sight.

At that moment she decided that she hated the boy called James Potter.

Eleven year old James Potter laughed with his friend as the girl named Evans fell through the wall, a look of surprise and terror on her face. 

He didn't know why he did it, but something about her made him nervous.

She had thick, red hair that went down right past her shoulders, and emerald green eyes that sparkled like stars in the sky.

Although he continued to roar with laughter, he was mentally beating himself up, for ruining any chance he had of being friends with Lily Evans.

Lily began walking around, until she found a compartment with only one person in it.

"Hi, I'm Lily Evans. May I sit here?"

The girl, who had previously been reading a book, looked up. Lily could instantly tell that she was beautiful. The girl has straight black hair that went down to her waist, and large, baby blue eyes. A smile spread across the girl's face and she said,

"Hello, I'm Parker, Parker Smith. Of course you can sit here."

Lily gratefully sank into the seat beside Parker, happy to have a friend.

Right then, another small girl, with dirty blonde hair, and exquisite purple eyes, timidly entered the compartment.

"Hi!" Parker and Lily exclaimed together. "Would you like to sit with us?" Lily asked.

The girls brightened considerably. She smiled brightly and replied,

"Absolutely, thank you for the invitation. My name is Stephanie Johnson."

Lily and Parker quickly introduced themselves, and pretty soon Parker and Stephanie were telling Lily about the different houses that Hogwarts had.

James and Sirius found a compartment and sat down.

The first thing that they did was begin to plan pranks. They spent the next few minutes laughing about the different pranks that they could play on people.

Then, two boys entered the compartment.

The first had short sandy hair, and deep chocolate brown eyes. The other is not really worth describing, so I won't, except to say that he was fat.

Anyway, The first said, "Hi, I'm Remus Lupin, this is Peter Pettigrew, and the Slytherins are going around looking for first years to hex. Do you mind if we hide out here?"

Sirius looked up at them, then replied,

"Sure, you can totally sit here. I hate those Slytherins! It's too bad that my whole family has been in Slytherin. They are lying, cheating (this rampage went of for about five minutes before Sirius took a breath) and that is why I hate them!"

Remus and Peter entered the compartment, looking at Sirius like he was insane.

James was the first to speak. "Well, now that you guys are here you may as well help us with our first prank…"

Stephanie, Parker, and Lily were deep in conversation when they heard a scream from the compartment next door.

Parker stood up and went to see what was wrong. When she came back she was laughing so hard that Lily had to catch her when she collapsed, tears streaming down her face.

"What was wrong?" Stephanie questioned.

"P-permanent. Glue. F-f-f-feathers! SLYTHERINS!" At this Stephanie couldn't speak any more and once again collapsed to the floor.

Curious, Lily and Stephanie left their compartment, to see what had happened.

When they reached the destined compartment, they too could barely contain their amusement. 

Three fourth year Slytherins were sitting in their compartment, covered from head to toe in brightly colored feathers, and green goo.

Every time one of them tried to remove an feather, another one of the same color would grow back onto them. A big sign was above them that read:

**Courtesy of… well, we don't really have a name yet. **  
Sirius, you prat, you weren't supposed to write that!  
**Well, you weren't supposed to write that, Jamsie.  
**And you weren't supposed to write that either, you git! And don't call me Jamsie!  
_Would both of you just shut up?  
_**Sorry Remus, we'll stop…**

Just the sign was enough to get Lily to start laughing, and Stephanie had to drag her away, before the Slytherins killed her.

When they got back to the compartment, they all started to laugh again, and they knew it was going to be a very interesting year.


	2. pranks and boring introductions

After the train stopped, Lily and her two new friends got off.

As they exited they heard a loud voice saying "firs' years over here! Firs' years over here!" The three friends headed towards the voice, and when they arrived at their destination, they saw a multitude of boats in a lake.

"Four ter a boat! Four ter a boat!" The same loud voice said. The three friends hurriedly climbed into a boat.

Soon after they were comfortable in a boat, another girl joined them. "Hey!" Said the girl with short brown hair, and a round friendly face. "My name's Alice. Can I join you?"  
Without waiting for an answer Alice climbed into the boat. They other girls introduced themselves, and were soon deep in conversation. After a while, the boats began to move, and to the girls deep dismay, a boat full of boys pulled up next to theirs.

And, that group of boys just happened to include James Potter.

"Hey Flower! Who are you friends?" James yelled to Lily.

Instead of answering, Lily pulled a chocolate frog out of her bag, and threw it at his head.

As expected, James ducked. However, as he did that, he threw the boat of balance, and it tipped over. Everybody around them began to laugh, and the girls in the next boat were back in their discussion.

(A/N: I didn't really want to write about the sorting, so this is at the feast, after everybody had been sorted. I'm hoping that you read enough Harry Potter, that you basically know who got sorted into which houses.)

James watched the four girls as they laughed. Lily was shoving the girl next to her playfully, and they kept pointing over at him. Lily was getting more forceful with each shove, until finally, they both fell out of their chairs and onto the floor. They were laughing as they got back up, and James wanted to know what they were talking about.

"James. James! JAMES! OY! JAMSIE-BOY!" Sirius bellowed in James' ear."What do you want Sirius? And I told you, don't call me Jamsie!"

"Sorry mate, but you weren't listening!"

"Fine, what were you saying?"

"Well before you drifted off, we were discussing pranks to play. So far we've decided to turn Malfoy's food into slugs. That prat."

"Oh, that blonde guy on the train? Okay, Sirius, do you know the spell?"

"No, but I'm sure Remmy here does."

"Call me Remmy again, and you're getting nothing."

"Fine, Remus. What's the spell?"

"Slugosis"

In barely a whisper Sirius pointed his wand at the Slytherin table and muttered the spell. At this point, James decided to start a count down.

He stood up on the table and yelled,

"**5**," at this everybody looked up.

"**4**," some people joined in.

"**3**," the Slytherins went back to their food.

"**2**," even the some of the teachers were joining in.

"**1**," people were nearly exploding with excitement.

"**0**!"  
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"AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!_**"

Everybody turned to the Slytherin table. It was an odd sight. Everybody on the entire right half of the table were headless. Everybody on the left side of the table had two heads. Everybody at the table was glowing in pink and green stripes. It was silent for a moment. Then, the entire hall (with the exception of the Slytherins) erupted in laughter.

Remus turned to Sirius and muttered, "What did you DO?"

"Nothing.." Sirius replied as innocently as he could while laughing along with everybody else.

Madame Pomfrey hurried over to the Slytherins and began attempting to put them right. This only made Sirius laugh harder. Remus then pushed Sirius into his food.

After everybody had finished laughing, and they had been showed to their dormitories, (the teachers completely forgot to punish James and his friends) The four friends sank gratefully into their beds.

The girls arrived at their dormitory, still discussing the night's events.  
"Personally, I'm afraid. If they can do that on the first day of school, imagine what they will be able to do once they learn how do more complex spells." Lily said. Her friends agreed with her, and they climbed into bed unaware of the surprises to come.

The next morning, the girls all dressed and headed down for breakfast. When they got there, they got their schedules.

"9:00, History of Magic," Lily read aloud. Her friends groaned.  
"History of Magic is the most boring class there is," Parker explained at Lily's questioning look. "Hardly anyone can stay awake."

They arrived at their first class to find that James and his friends were already there. He stood up and said,

"Hey flower! I thought that I would introduce you to my friends."

Lily, looked at him. She was not expecting this.

"This is Sirius Black, but you already know him" The handsome boy swooped in front of James and murmured "Pleasure to see you again Lily, pleasure."

Lily giggled and replied, " The pleasure is mine Black," with a fake curtsy.

"And this is Remus Lupin," James continued. The wiry boy with sandy colored hair and clear blue eyes, stepped up and said "Nice to meet you Lily,"

"And this is Peter Pettigrew," James finished. Peter just grunted from his spot.

"Now, will you introduce me to your lovely friends without throwing things at me?" James asked.

"Fine.. This is Parker." The beautiful girl stepped up and pretended not to notice the boys jaws as they dropped.

"This is Stephanie" Once again the boys looked astonished at her beauty, and Remus actually stepped up and said ,

"Your eyes are the most amazing color." Stephanie blushed at this and thanked him.

" And this is Alice, wait, ALICE come over here for a second!" The girl looked up from her conversation with a second year and came over.

"What?" she said. "You messed up my conversation with Frank" The other three gave each other significant looks, then began to giggle. They finally stopped, and Lily spoke once more.

"Sorry 'bout that Alice, but Potter wanted to meet you." James shook her hand.

"Okay, now go away Potter."

"Why, what did I do?" James asked, somewhat shocked.

"Well, you never apologized for yesterday." Lily replied.

"You should be honored that I even touched you. Most girls would die to have that opportunity."

"Okay, now your being an arrogant prick. Go away Potter." When he didn't move, Lily and her friends picked up their things and moved.

James turned to his friends, who were all standing behind him and said,

"This calls for revenge."


	3. the adventures of breakfast and hair

Oh, The Possibilities!

Disclaimer: somehow, i doubt that you people are stupid enough to think that i own any of the characters...

"Well, as everybody knows, we're giving Lily Evans a taste of her own medicine. We have gathered here today to plot revenge-"

"Sirius! Do you have to do this every time we get together?" Remus interrupted.

"Sorry Remus..."

"Okay! What should we do?" James said impatiently.

"Toilet Paper?" Sirius suggested.

"Nah, boring." James replied.

"Dung Bombs?" Remus quipped.

"Not original enough." James rejected.

"Food coloring?" Peter questioned enthusiastically.

"What on earth would we do with food coloring Peter?" James asked.

"I dunno, it sounded good in my head..."

"Oh! I have an idea!" Sirius exclaimed.

All of them leaned close and listened to his plan.

"BRILLIANT!" exclaimed James loudly when Sirius was finished.

"Morning all!" Lily said.

"Oh no! Not a... MORNING PERSON!" Steph groaned.

Lily was about to reply when Alice interrupted.

"Lily! Look at your hair! Look at all of our hair!"

It was quite a sight indeed. Lily's hair was bright purple with orange spots. Steph's hair was green with yellow spots. Parker's was red with blue, and worst of all was Alice who was sporting a horrible combination of pink and forest green.  
After a few minutes Lily broke the silence.

"We are SO gonna start a trend!"

The four friends laughed, did their extremely colorful hair, and went to breakfast.

James and friends were still laughing as they went down to breakfast. However, to their immense surprise, Lily and her friends were sitting at the table, showing everybody their new hair 'style' proudly. 

"Hey! Remus! Look what my hair can do!" Lily shouted as she poked a spot, and it shot out glitter, all over an unfortunate fourth year.

Remus smiled and walked over to them. James looked in jealousy as Lily laughed and showed the crowd another 'trick'.

"Be back James. See you later!" Sirius said, before leaving to join the fun. Again, James felt his heart clench in jealousy as Sirius swooped down behind Lily, grabbed her, and began to dance with her.

James was sure that she would pull away. But, instead she laughed, and pulled him into a waltz.

Remus, by this point had managed to get a bowl of porridge dumped on him, and he was scowling as Parker and Steph laughed at him.

Alice was flirting with the second year again, even with her colorful hair.

Peter was standing next to James, muttering something about evil jello taking over the world.

So, not being one to miss ignore a fun time, James walked over to Remus and dumped porridge down his shirt.

"BLOODY IDIOT!" Remus yelled in surprise. The entire hall went silent.

"Ummmm... HI!" Sirius yelled. Then, he went back to his dance.

Suddenly Music started playing. It took a while for everybody to realize that is was coming from Lily, Parker, Steph, and Alice's hair.

Soon after, all the houses accept for Slytherin were participating in the dance.

All in all, it was a hectic breakfast.


	4. Totally random and pointless junk

Oh, the possibilites!

Disclaimer: jeez! Do i really have to tell you people again? ITS NOT MINE!

(A/N: hello! This chappie is really random, has basically no plot, and it's all because i have... WRITER'S BLOCK! Yippee! My very own writer's block! sobs with joy)

It was a clear, sunny day, classes were over for the week, so, James and friends were wandering about outside, doing nothing, when all of a sudden... RANDOM NINJA'S ATTACKED!

They hopped out of the bush and were running towards to boys. Peter cried in a corner, while Remus tried to talk the ninjas into being peaceful, James wailed for Lily to come help him, and Sirius patheticly attempted to do some karate moves that he had seen done by a portrait in Dumbledore's office (he had been there twice already).

Suddenly, the ninjas stopped attacking, looked at the boys and walked off.

Everybody sat in shock for a while.

The giant squid pulled Peter into the lake.

He screamed.

A lot.

No one cared.

Then, all of a sudden, the author of this stupid fanfic popped into the room, whispered something in James' ear, then disappeared.

"Sirius, Remus, we have to save him, so that he can be a traitor, kill most of us, and work for Voldie!"

Of course, after that bit of news, Remus, Sirius and James jumped into the water.

While the boys were saving Peter so he could get the killed, the girls were having difficulties of their own. 

"AHHHHHH! NOT THE EVIL SQUIRRELS!" Parker yelled.

You see, the girls were currently being chased by evil, pink, and glittery squirrels.

Suddenly, Steph bend down and began to yell in jibberish to the squirrels.

"What is Steph DOING!" Lily asked.

"I'm not really sure..." Parker and Alice said together.

Suddenly, the author popped into the story AGAIN!

"you guys are really stupid..." the author said. 

"Steph is obviously speaking squirrel!"

"Oh!" said Lily, Parker and Alice.

Now that her characters had stopped being stupid, the author left again.

"I didn't really like her. She was kinda weird." Alice said.

Suddenly, Alice was struck by a bolt of lightning.

Unfortunately, for purposes of the plot that will come back in the next chapter, (A/N: maybe it will, maybe it won't, it depends on what you reviewers say!) Alice popped back to life, and everybody except for the author cheered.

Parker opened her mouth to complain to the author, but Alice stopped her.

"Do. Not. Insult. The. Author!" Alice whispered.

Anyway, now that the author had left, Steph stopped speaking squirrel.

"Hey guys, they say that they are going to eat us. They wouldn't tell me how to stop them though." Steph said.

"Nothing at all?" Lily questioned.

"Well, they did say that their only fear was the author... but then they told me I'm not aloud to use the author..."

"WE'RE DOOMED!" all four of them yelled.

Meanwhile...

They boys had revived Peter and were congratulating him on his Traitor Of The Year award.

Next time: the plot comes back... unless you don't want it too. Tell me! More nonsense, or an actual plot! R&R! 


	5. totally not funny stuff and a twist

Disclaimer: not mine...

Okay, first of all, I'd like to thank my amazing reviewer, SiriuslyFunnywho reviewed every chapter of my story, no matter how pointless! Also, the plot has come back, but in this chapter there will be a MAJOR twist. No flames please, because in my opinion this twist is not really all that far-fetched.

Lily was sitting outside by the lake. She loved the feeling of the wind passing through her thick hair. She loved the smell of the water, and all of the little things that came with it. And so she sat. Her bare feet in the water, staring out at the nothingness.

James was watching her. He watched as she smiled when the wind blew softly at her face. He knew that she loved it. He knew that he loved her.

Absurd, I know. An eleven year old boy in love. But, he was. And he knew it. It was the way that she smiled. The sound of her laugh. But, he knew that she didn't love him back.

He knew that she wouldn't love him back for a long time. But he knew. He knew that one day, she would. He would just have to wait.

The next morning James and his friends went downstairs to the great hall. They all immediately walked over to Lily and her friends.

"Hi Flower. 'Sup?" James asked

Lily ignored him completely. Parker then turned to her schedule.

"9:00, Potions" Parker read.

They all headed down to the dungeons. Once everybody arrived, the professor began to speak.

"Now, you may not think that potions is a useful branch of magic. But, you thought wrong. Potions very well may be one of the most helpful, and dangerous types of magic that there is. I will teach you all you need to know. But, take heed, if you do not listen to my words you could end up injured, or worse."

Following this statement, there was complete silence. The Professor began to speak again.

"This potion is very complex for you age. I warn you, do not drop your cauldron. If this potion makes contact with the floor, it will produce a thick fog. You will not be able to see in the fog AT ALL. It will not take very much to trip and hurt yourself. The directions are on the board."

The class immediately began to work.

"Hey, Sirius."

"What Jamie?"

"Don't call me Jamie!"

"Why not... Jamie?"

**BOOM **

Just as Professor Slughorn had said, a thick white fog filled the room.

"Crap! See what you made me do Sirius. I can't believe i knocked that over! You distracted me!"

BAM

"What was that James? Did you fall?"

"No you twit. I didn't fall."

Then, the smoke disappeared. What it revealed was everybody, including Slughorn sitting in a shocked silence. Suddenly, James realized that a certain red head wasn't visible.

He stood, and saw, to his horror, Lily Evans, lying unconscious in front of his desk, her face turning a sickly green color, and blood slowly pooling around of here head.

"Everybody stay put. I'm going to go get help. STAY PUT MR.POTTER!" Professor Slughorn said as James made a move towards Lily.

"B-B-But Professor, Lil-"

"Mr. Potter, kindly be quite so I can go get assistance"

"But Prof-"

"ENOUGH MR. POTTER!" the professor bellowed as he left the room.

As soon as the door shut, James picked Lily up and left for the hospital wing. James cried the whole way, knowing that her pain was his fault. Only when Madame Pomfrey removed her from him, did he realize that he was soaked in Lily's blood.

James visited Lily everyday. Finally, during one of his visits, about a week after 'the accident' Lily woke up.

"Lily!" James exclaimed.

"Who are you," Lily asked groggily.

"James! Don't you... remember me?"

"No." Lily stated. "Where are the spork people?"

"Spork people?" James questioned, confused.

"Yes, the spork people!"

"I'm sorry Lily, I don't know."

Lily took out her wand.

"Meeple, keeple, jeeple, bring me back my spork people."

James had to fight back a laugh. I mean come on, there is no way that that spell would work. But, to James surprise, a bag popped up in front of Lily.

She emptied the bag's contents. In it were a bunch of sporks, with faces glued to them.

Then, she began to play with them, talking to them like real people.

James jumped up and ran to get everyone who would come.

15 minutes later, Alice, Parker, Stephanie, Remus, Sirius, and Peter were in the room with James. Each went up to her, and introduced themselves.

"Hi Lily. Do you remember me?"

Each asked the same question. Each was given the same answer. No. Except for Sirius. Before he even opened his mouth, he heard a squeal of delight.

"Siri! Is that you? I can't believe it, you look so old."

Sirius stared at her. Then, something clicked.

"Lily? Lily Evans. THAT Lily Evans? No! There is no WAY that this is happening. Not now!"

Everybody watched the two is shock. Lily looked up at Sirius.

"Where are we Siri? How come you didn't write me? How come, after years of years of not seeing each other, you haven't even given me a hug?" She said accusingly.

"Sorry Lils. I didn't recognize you for a sec."

He then scooped her up in a bone crushing hug. After which, they continued to talk (everybody else still watching in shock) until Madame Pomfrey ushered them out.

"What the heck was that!" James exclaimed.

Sirius looked at the floor for a minute before explaining.

"Me and Lily used to live next door to each other. We were best friends. We hung out all the time. We knew everything about each other. Then, one day Lily found out that she was a witch.

"We had been hanging out at my house, and I accidentally left my wand out. She picked it up and made up a spell, just for the fun of it. Neither of us expected for the spell to work. Well, my mom found out. The next day, Lily came over to my house. My mother answered the door.

"She looked at Lily screamed 'Mudblood' and beat her unconscious with a broom. When she came around, My mother erased her memories. Soon after, Lily and her parents moved to another part of London, and Lily didn't realize that she was a witch until she was eleven.

"I had forgotten about her. I didn't want to remember the pain she underwent at the hands of my mother, so, I forgot about he completely."

At this, Sirius couldn't contain this emotions any longer, and broke into sobs. He rolled over on his bed, and wouldn't answer when James called his name.

After a while, James turned off the light. He lay down, but stayed up long into the night thinking about what he had just heard, and listening to Sirius' sobs, which continued long after James finally fell asleep.


	6. Laughing and fun with a few mishaps

Hi ya! 'Sup? It's been a while but I've been pretty busy so I haven't had a chance to update. Ok, first off, I'd like to thank my trusty reviewer, SiriuslyFunny. You make me feel happy . Second, I'd just like to bring up the fact that I have 5 reviews and 204 hits, so all of you non reviewers, REVIEW! I'll give you cookies…

Disclaimer: All of it is TOTALLY mine. I wish….

Chapter 6: Laughter and fun, with a few mishaps along the way.

The weeks went by.

Lily still hadn't regained her memory.

Sirius spent all his time in the hospital with her.

(A/N: I know some of you were hoping that this would go on, but for purposes of the plot, Lily's memory has to come back.)

Finally, one day Lily got a shocked expression on her face.

"Sirius?"

"Ya Lils?"

"Why are we in the hospital wing?"

"What are you talking about Lily? You've been here for weeks!"

"WHAT? No! What about my classes?"

"Wait a second…. Lily, do you know where we are?"

"Duh, we're at Hogwarts. Where else would we be?"

"Do you still know who I am?"

"Umm…. Ya…. Who else would you be? You're my best friend, Sirius Black!"

"LILY! You remember me!"

"Why wouldn't I remember you, Siri?"

"No reason."

The next few weeks were the same as they had been before 'the accident'. Lily remembered everything. The only difference was that she remembered Sirius as well.

A few weeks later, silence echoed across the grounds. Or, at least that was what the teachers were wishing.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Sirius screamed. Lily, Parker and Steph were all chasing him. Finally, the caught up to him. BOOM. Down he went as he was tackled.   
Unfortunately, he was tackled at the top of a hill.

Which, in my opinion, was not the smartest idea.

Having all fallen on him, the girls attempted to get off of Sirius. 

Which threw them off balance.

Which sent them flying, all in a ball, over the hill.

Into the lake.

Smart people, aren't they?

When they finally got out of the lake, and untangled, they looked up to see Remus and James laughing their heads off.

The four wet friends looked at each other, then proceeded to walk silently up the hill. Then, they pushed their unsuspecting friends.

Down they went.

Once again, into the lake.

And, that is how seven people ended up walking around all day, smelling like lake water.

In Sirius' opinion this was the best his life had ever been.

Until he got the letter.

That morning, at breakfast, his gray owl came swooping down on him.

He pulled the letter from it's talons, and read it in silence.

After a minute, he handed the letter to Lily.

Sirius,

You wretched boy! How dare you disgrace to name of Black by becoming friends with that muggle scum!  
Oh, yes I know about that. You may think you have escaped by going to that awful school, but I have spies everywhere. And that Potter boy! Blood traitor if I've ever seen one! Why him you idiot? Why not a friend from a respectable family, like the Malfoy child? You are too pig headed to listen to me, but take heed. If you continue to strut around with that filthy mudblood, and that traitor, you may find that their lives, as well as yours are in danger. I'm watching you.

- Mother

With that, Lily promptly tore the letter in half.

"If she thinks that an empty threat like that's gonna get rid of me, then she's obviously the idiot." Lily smiled.

"Ditto!" James exclaimed.

Sirius smiled, but couldn't help wondering if it was really an empty threat.

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Hehehe! Okay, I know that there has been a lot of Sirius in the past couple of chapters, but I'm planning on altering point of views. You know that part when they fell in the lake? Ya, that actually happened! Me, Anna, and Kenzie all tackled Sean. And fell in a lake. Ouch. We were wet all day. It sucked to go to classes all wet like that…. So, my advice to you: don't fall in lakes. R&R please!


	7. Sirius goes insane

Once again, Hi ya! Thank you to my reviewer, SiriuslyFunny! This chappie is dedicated to you for being such a faithful reviewer, and because you love Sirius! And once again, I'd like to point out that I have 6 reviews, and 243 hits! That means that only .02 of people who have read me story, have reviewed it! And, I haven't gone back on my promise hands out cookies to reviewers This week it's cake! You don't wanna miss the cake, do you? Review!

Disclaimer: says in bored voice not mine. Get used to it.

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"NEW BEST FRIEND!" Sirius yelled.

He proceeded to jump onto Severus and Lucius' table, hug Snape, then lay down and tell his life story.

The 'Dream Team' as the school had taken to calling the four girls, looked on in awe.

"Who gave him the firewhisky?" Asked Professor Slughorn asked.

"Not firewhisky, sir. It was a… sugar quill." James said in an ashamed voice. "I didn't mean to give it to him, he just sort of, got it. I'M SO SORRY!" He wailed.

Slughorn just looked at Sirius, who was now enchanting daisies to grow out of Severus and Lucius' head, while explaining what his third birthday party was like. 

Snape and Malfoy were too shocked to say anything. Sirius was now singing 'Hakuna Matata' in an off pitch voice. Some had enough sense to wonder how Sirius knew a muggle song.

But most were too weirded out to think anything.

You see, Sirius had been so down after receiving that awful letter, that he was very down. And upset equals boring.

So, James, being the smart person that he is, gave Sirius a sugar quill to cheer him up. 

Needless to say, it worked.

So after destroying the dorm, common room, and any hallway he walked down, he arrived at the potion's room.

And decided that Severus and Lucius were his new best friends.

And so now, they were in potions, attempting to do their work, while Sirius continued to talk about… himself. How many saw that coming?

Anyway, while doing potions, Lily figured that Sirius was probably at his seventh Christmas by now.

Unfortunately, Sirius decided that it would be fun to drink Lucius' potion.

30 seconds later, Sirius was dressed in all pink.

"Oh. My. Gosh. I am SOOOO hot! Lily! You look marvelous!"

You see, they were working on a gender changing potion. Sirius was now a girl. And he was pretty sure that Lily was his best friend."

"Lily, you should have seen Orlando Bloom in that muggle magazine I was reading earlier! He was so hot! Oh, and look at that blonde guy over there! Is he hot, or is he hot?" Sirius squealed.

"I know! Orlando Bloom is SOO hot! But, I don't know about Malfoy. His blonde hair is HOT! But, his attitude sucks." Lily replied, absolutely ecstatic that Sirius was a girl.

This comment was very unfortunate for James.

You see, he had been laughing so hard, that him face had somehow ended up in his own potion. When Lily made this comment, his jaw dropped in shock. Allowing the potion to flood his mouth.

In surprise, he swallowed the cool liquid.

30 seconds later, him and Sirius were in a deep conversation about the hottest hotties of hotness. 

Then Remus made a bad mistake. He spoke.

"So, girlies, either of you wanna go out with me?" He asked jokingly.

"HOW RUDE!" Sirius yelled., before dumping his/her potion over Remus' head. 

Like James, Remus accidentally swallowed the potion.

30 seconds later, James, Remus, Sirius, Lily, Parker, Alice, and Steph were all in a discussion about cute hair styles. No one noticed that Peter had escaped the wrath of the girls by sitting with the Slytherins. 

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I know short, but I got writers block. Anyway, I decided that I'm only going to include classes if something important happens in them. So, if they suddenly know a new spell, or something, it because, believe it or not, they HAVE been going to classes. Please Review! I know you want to!


	8. Letra de la Muerte

Hi ya peeps! 'Sup? Well, today I am extremely pleased to say that this story currently has 10 reviews (thank you to remyluver13, oOo The Skittle Queen oOo, and SiriuslyFunny) and is on two favorite lists ( A big old thank you to SiriuslyFunny, and Hamaza) and is on one alert list ( thank you muchly to FyAnnwn). Anyway, once again, I have NOT gone back on my promise (hands out a big slice of cake to reviewers). I have 10 reviews and 357 hits, which means only .02 people who read this review it! This week I'm giving out candy, you can choose your own kind, so REVIEW!

Disclaimer: Once again, for what is now the eighth time: Not mine.

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Chapter 8: letra de la muerte (Letter of death)

(A/N: I couldn't think of a way to have the marauders think of marauders, so they just randomly became the marauders.)

The common room was in hysterics.

Some were having trouble breathing.

A couple of people were even on the floor.

Everybody was laughing.

The Dream Team, and the Marauders had decided to prank each other on the same night.

The boys had bewitched the girl's ceiling to spit glitter and sticky fluff.

The girls had made an invisible trip wire at the bottom of the boy's stair case. They had done it so it only activated when the marauders stepped across it, and it also turned it's victim hot pink.

So, the girls woke up a mess, and ran down the staircase to yell at the boys.

They happened to do this right as the boys came down their staircase.

The boys tripped over the wire.

James hit Lily, knocking her over.

By now, all the marauders had gotten up from the floor.

James whirled around quickly to find Lily.

He tripped over her feet and fell next to her.

Sirius turned to look for James, tripped and fell.  
By now, they were on the girl's staircase.

It turned into a slide, and the eight of them fell and rolled into the common room.

There was silence for a moment, then everybody around the group erupted into laughter at the sight of the sparkly, pink, and fluffy ball, struggling madly to get loose.

And that is how their day went.

Not able to get any of the stuff covering them off, the eight of them had to walk around like that.

And to make things even better for them, John Creevy kept snapping pictures of them.

That night, after everything had finally disappeared, the group decided hang out downstairs.

They were all talking and laughing when all of a sudden Sirius got up and left.

A few minutes later he came back up, holding mounds of food.

They are began to pig out, when all of sudden, Sirius chucked a handful of chips at Steph.

Parker, defending her friend, picked up a handful of ketchup, and sent it flying at Sirius' face.

However, she missed and hit Remus.

Remus picked up a biscuit, and chucked it a Parker, however it accidentally hit Peter, who threw something at James.

This cycle went on for a while.

By the end of it, everybody was covered in food and goo.

It had been a wonderful night.

Everybody had been laughing, and having a good time.

The girls walked upstairs, after bidding the boys goodnight, still laughing.

They all got to their room, took turns using the shower, then climbed into bed.

Once all the girls besides Lily had fallen asleep, Lily started to feel something that she had never felt at Hogwarts before.  
Loneliness.

She all of a sudden felt very depressed, like there was nothing she could do to feel better.

She fell asleep, drops of water running down her face silently.

Little did she know, there was a very good reason for her tears.

The next morning, she woke, still with a sinking feeling in her stomach.

She walked down to breakfast with her friends, pretending like nothing was wrong.

When the owls came, to Lily's surprise, one dropped a letter in front of her.

However, her surprise quickly turned to shock as she read the letter.

She fled the room in tears, the letter fluttering to the ground.

Alice picked it up and read it.

**_Dear Miss Evans, _**

We are deeply sorry to report that at 10:14 last night, your parents, John and Christine Evans, were found dead in their home. We send you our sincerest apologies for your loss. For more information please contact your Headmaster. Have a good day!

_Cornelius Fudge_**  
_Cornelius Fudge, Minister of Magic._**


	9. The tears dropped Lily

Hi ya peeps! 'Sup?Anyway, thank you muchly to SiriuslyFunny!You didn't pick you candy that you wanted, so I'm picking for you! (Hands skittles over) Oh ya, only .02 of people who read this story review it, so REVIEW!

Disclaimer: For what will now be the 9th time, it's not mine!

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Chapter 9: The tears dropped Lily

Lily sat by herself in a corner. 

My parents are dead.

The words kept running over and over in her head.

Tears rolled down her face.

All of a sudden, she got up, grabbed a blanket, and walked downstairs.

She walked onto the grounds, and to the broom shed.

She grabbed a spare broom, got on it and took off.

She flew to the highest tower.

There, she fell asleep. 

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People searched for Lily for almost a week.

James and Sirius went silent, and sobs were often heard from whichever corner they were sitting in.

The rest of the Dream Team acted like robots. Yes and no answers. Never cracking a smile.

They had lost all hope of ever finding their friend.

But then, one day, during dinner, the doors to the great hall opened.

In came a very read eyed, cold, and distraught looking Lily, carrying a broom.

Nobody moved.

Suddenly, Sirius jumped up, picked her up, and carried her out of the great hall.

Later that evening, he met the rest of the group up in the common room, looking grim.

"She's starving, freezing, in shock, and badly hurt." Sirius said.

"How did she get hurt?" James asked.

"She was flying down, when she lost her balance, and fell. Pomfrey says that it's a mirical that she managed to walk to the great hall by herself."

Suddenly, Alice stood.

"I have to help her! Let me go help her!" Alice panicked.

The rest of the group grabbed onto her as she attempted to run.

"What are you doing to Alice?"

The sudden voice frightened everybody.

They turned around to see Frank, looking shocked and outraged.

"She's freaking out! We can't calm her down!" Steph said.

Frank went while. He hurried over and began to talk.

As soon nd his voice sounded, Alice began to calm down.

After a few minutes, she was calm.

Parker and Steph helped her up, and walked her to their dorm. 

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Lily came back from the hospital three days later.

She was very quiet.

She sat in the common room by herself most of the time.

Until Sirius decided that he was going to intervene. 

"Lily. Today, you and I are going to make noodles."

"What!" Lily asked in shock.

"Noodles, Lily, noodles. You know, those slimy, squiggly things that you eat?"

"I know what noodles are Sirius. I just don't know why on earth we are making them."

"We're making them cause I love to make noodles, and you love me, therefore, you love making noodles too!"

"Interesting logic, but ok, I'll help you make noodles."

So, Sirius and Lily went down to the kitchens. (A/N: I don't know how they know where the kitchens are, but the do so, ya)

Once they got there, Lily asked the elves for a muggle cookbook. When they got it, Lily read the first instruction.

"Put two cups of flour onto a flat surface. Then, crack five eggs onto the flour."

So, they did. But the time they were done with that step, the kitchen was white, and they were both covered in egg.

Then the added olive oil, then they began to mix it.

Then, they cut it into noodle shapes.

By the time they were done with that, Lily had made 50 thinly sliced strips and Sirius had made two heart a diamond and his name in the dough.

Lily decided to put Sirius in charge of the next part. 

"Ok Sirius, this is easy. Just put the noodles into the water."

Sirius was in the process of doing this when the door banged open.

"Hi ya guys!" James yelled.

"BLOODY HECK!" Sirius yelled.

James took this as a sign of danger and fled.

However, he was wrong.

As soon as he left, Sirius collapsed into ball on the floor, cracking up.

"Big. Hunk. Noodle. Ball!" Sirius managed to say.

Now, to Lily this sounded rather dirty, so she decided to ask what was going on.

"Ok, so I was putting in a whole bunch of noodles. When the door opened, I accidentally squished them all together. Then, when James spoke, it scared the crap out of me, and I dropped it into the pan. Now there's a huge ball of noodle in our spaghetti!" Sirius managed to get out before laughing again.

Now, Lily was laughing too.

After a while, they stopped laughing.

Their noodles were done, so they took them out.

They got two forks, and each took a bite.

Sirius turned an odd green color.

Lily gagged.

"It was slimy! Like goo!" Lily exclaimed.

" It tasted like flour!" Sirius said.

"Wanna find the big ball?" Lily asked.

"Sure!"

So, the two went searching. Eventually they found it.

A big, gooey ball of noodle.

"What do you say we take a bite at the same time?" Sirius suggested.

Lily nodded.

They each took a bite. Or at least they tried.

"OWW!" Sirius yelled.

" Unghh... My teeth. That thing was hard!" Lily exclaimed.

The two of them left their noodle mess in the kitchens, and walked towards to common room, laughing.

After a while, Peter, James, Alice, Parker, and Steph joined them, and they all walked to the common room.

However, Sirius' smiling face suddenly turned to a frown.

There on the table was his families owl.

He tore the letter open.

_Dear Sirius,_

I warned you. I told you I had spies all over the place. I told you to stop hanging out with those worthless beings! But you didn't listen. And now, you and your friends WILL pay. One by one. I suggest you look around. By now, one of you little friends should be missing. By the way, I heard the mudblood's parent were killed. Serves them right. Have fun looking for your little friend. There is NOTHING you can do to stop me now you pathetic excuse for a Black.

-Mother

Sirius dropped the letter and looked around.

"Remus..." he muttered.

Then, he ran, leaving his very confused friends watching him.

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Longest chappie so far! Hope you liked it! R&R please! Pretty please! 


	10. Oh Flower, Thee I Command

Hi ya peeps! 'Sup? Anyway, I'd like to thank my AMAZING reviewers! I loves you muchly! Anyway, I'm really happy, because I just got back from a date with my best friend Kenzie, and her boyfriend RaYmOnD (inside joke). We saw The Fog. It wasn't as scary as I expected, but Kenzie and I got to hold hands with our dates anyway. Now, what you've all been waiting for…… the next chappie!

Disclaimer: For what is now the 10th time, (woohoo , double digits!) not mine!

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Chapter 10 (): Oh Flower, Thee I command.

**RECAP:**

_Dear Sirius, _

_I warned you. I told you I had spies all over the place. I told you to stop hanging out with those worthless beings! But you didn't listen. And now, you and your friends WILL pay. One by one. I suggest you look around. By now, one of you little friends should be missing. By the way, I heard the mudblood's parent were killed. Serves them right. Have fun looking for your little friend. There is NOTHING you can do to stop me now you pathetic excuse for a Black. _

_-Mother _

Sirius dropped the letter and looked around.

"Remus..." he muttered.

Then, he ran, leaving his very confused friends watching him.

**NOW, ONTO THE STORY.**

"Why is Sirius saying my name?" Parker asked. But this wasn't Parker's soft voice.

It was Remus' deep, handsome voice.

But, when they turned around, they realized that where Parker used to be, was Remus.

"Because he thought his mom got you! But she must've actually gotten Parker! We've got to go tell him." James stated.

Then, they ran. They chased Sirius, shouting his name.

Eventually, they caught up to him.

"Sirius, Remus is right here, we're looking for Parker, she's the one that's gone!" Alice exclaimed.

"Fine, fine, whatever, we gotta go find them!" Sirius answered.

"But, do you even know where they are?" Remus questioned.

"No, but I've got a hunch. My mum used to tell Regulus (sp?) that her favorite hangout  
was the astronomy tower. I think they may be up there!" Sirius answered. 

So they ran. And then, when they reached the stairs, they climbed. And climbed.

Finally, they reached the top.

Sirius was right. There at the top, was Parker, lying on the ground. Not moving.

Sirius rushed over to her.

He began trying to wake her up. The others rushed over to help.

Suddenly, Parker sat up, even though her face was still blank.

Then, in a cold, hollow voice she began to speak.

"Oh Flower, thee I command. Stretch your vines out. Grab onto the souls of humans. Bring them back to me, oh Flower. You cannot protect those that you love, for you must do the duties I command of thee! Oh flower, I command thee. Wilt, and die, oh flower, thee I command."

With that, Parker fell back to the ground.

Behind them, they heard an odd sound.

Sirius slowly turned around, and began to slowly crawl backwards.

The rest of the group turned around, and saw Lily.

But not the Lily they were used to.

This Lily was rigid. Her normally emerald green eyes, were burning red with fury. The smile that usually graced her face, was now a lock-jawed frown.

"Grab onto the souls of humans." She whispered. 

She began advancing on them.

And suddenly, James understood.

Lily was under a curse. One of the worst kind. 

James had read about it in one of his father's books.

A medium is used to cast the curse.

Parker's body had been possessed, and had aimed a curse at Lily.

Now that Lily had been cursed, there was only one thing that could snap her out of it. 

Someone else with some sort of magical disability. A vampire, or werewolf. Somebody like that, they were the only ones that could stop her now.

So, basically, they were doomed.

_REMUS POV_

'Oh no! I know what this is. And I'm willing to bet that I'm the only one here who can stop it. But, if I do, they will all know my secret. But if I don't, we'll all die. I have to do it!' I thought.

So, I did the one thing that would save our lives, the one thing that would make me loose all of my friends. 

I rolled up my sleeve, to the point where the werewolf had bit me. I cringed at the scars.

But, I did what I had to do. I took my arm, and walked up to the slowly advancing Lily.

And, I pressed the bite marks against her arm.

You could see the pain rushing through her. Like she had been struck by lightning. 

Then, I watched as she fell.

_3RD PERSON_There was only one thought going through James' head at that moment.

'Remus is a werewolf!'

He couldn't believe it.

The bite marks were on his arm, not his neck, so he couldn't be a vampire. He had to be a werewolf. 

"Yup, so now you guys know the real me! I'm a werewolf, run and scream!" Remus yelled, in a sort of panic.

"We would never leave you." Steph stated.

Those were the last words that Remus heard before, exhausted, he fell into blackness.

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Umm….. Dude…. I really did not have that planned. It just sort of happened. Actually, I had something TOTALLY different planned, but those ideas just, well, died, while I was writing the chapter. It's like my fingers have a mind of their own… Anyway, I hoped you liked it…. Oh ya, and I've been rereading my chapters, and I've noticed an immense amount of mistakes. I don't know if you've noticed, but I have. So, if anyone's interested, I'm currently searching for a beta, so I don't continue to leave the 'y' off of 'they' and stuff like that. Email me if your interested. R&R!


	11. Girls Night!

Hi ya peeps! 'Sup? I'd like to thank my awesome reviewers. Okay, in response to a review that I got, I don't really know where this story is going. I know it's Lily /James, but that's basically it. If you don't like it, you don't have to read it. Oh, well, hope you like this chapter. After all that intense stuff, I thought a nice, fun chapter was in order.

Disclaimer: For what is now the 11th time, not mine.

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Chapter 11: What happens when girls have a girls night…

Lily, Remus and Parker woke up in the hospital wing.

Parker was dead confused, Remus was shocked because his friends didn't hate him, and Lily didn't say a word to anybody.

"She's in shock," Madame Pomfrey explained. "First her parents, and now this. She doesn't know how to deal with what's going on in her head."

After about a week, Pomfrey released them. 

Everything went back to normal. Except for Lily. She was still silent. She wouldn't talk to Parker, Steph, Alice, or even Sirius.

Then one day something changed.

Lily still wasn't speaking, but as James climbed the slide to the girls dormitories, he heard her soft voice singing a song that he had never heard before.

" Gimme gimme gimme a man after midnight   
Won't somebody help me chase the shadows away  
Gimme gimme gimme a man after midnight  
Take me through the darkness to the break of the day."

Her voice sounded so pretty. He knocked on the door.

The voice stopped. She slowly walked over to the door and opened it.

She let James in.

"What were you singing Lily?"

And then, she spoke. For the first time in three days, she spoke.

"A-teens. My favorite band when I was little. Before I came here."

A small smile quickly graced her face at the memory, before being replaced by the recently familiar frown.

"Do you have the CD1?" James asked.

She nodded. Then, she handed the slender case to him, as well as her CD player .2

He listened to the catchy music, before grinning at her.

Her face flushed pleasantly.

"I know, it's stupid, but I loved them…" She explained.

"Ya, I used to listen to the muggle band when I was little. My older sister brought it home and convinced me it was wizarding music, and I got hooked."

"Who were they?"

"Um… ok, your gonna laugh, but Bewitched."

Lily burst out laughing.

"You… listened… to… BEWITCHED!"

"Ya…"

She laughed even harder.

"Shut up, Lily!"

"Potter, you were one WEIRD child. No, scratch that. You ARE one weird child!"

James' heart dropped. She had called him Potter. 

"Well, I'm gonna go get your friends, now that your talking again. They'll want to know."

"Okay, bye Potter."

James ventured down to the common room, where he knew all the girls were waiting eagerly for an update.

He forced a smile onto his face, and went downstairs.

"She spoke!" He exclaimed.

Immediately, all the girls, plus Sirius, went bounding up the stairs.

James and Remus (nobody knew where Peter was) were starting to get worried when the group wasn't downstairs two hours later.

So, they climbed up the slide, and opened the girl's door.

What they saw scared them half to death.

There was a large bag of sugar on the floor, almost empty.

And there was Sirius.

Sitting on Lily's bed.

Singing… the Backstreet Boys?

Geez Louise, Sirius knew a lot of muggle songs.

"Now I can see that we're falling apart  
From the way that it used to be, yeah  
No matter the distance  
I want you to know  
That deep down inside of me…  
You are my fire  
The one desire  
You are  
You are, you are, you are"

James and Remus immediately grabbed him, and carried him downstairs, to save some of his male pride.

Hours later, when most of the house had gone to bed, the girls snuck downstairs.

They put on their Backstreet Boys CD very softly, and sat around the fire.

They took out all their make-up and girlie things, and started doing, well, girlie things.

Alice did Lily's hair, while Parker did her nails, and Steph read from a magazine.

Little did they know, the boys were sitting on the staircase, listening.

After an hour of taking shifts doing things, all the girls looked wonderful, and they had gone through eight magazines.

"Now, it is time for the all powerful and traditional… Truth or Dare." Parker said dramatically.

"OOOH! I'll start!" Alice said, nearly jumping out of her skin.

"Okay then."

" Um… Steph, truth or dare?"

"Oh…. Dare, I guess."

"Ha ha, I've got a good one. I dare you to… go up to Dumbledore tomorrow, and tell him that you think that you guys should have 'The talk.' If he decides to play along, you have to actually give it to him."

The group of girls all began to crack up.

Steph looked mortified.

"Ok, but now it's my turn. Parker, truth or dare?"

"Dare, most definitely."

"Ok, I dare you to wear a pink tutu and a tiara to ALL of your classes tomorrow." Steph grinned.

Parker, for some reason looked excited.

"I've always wanted to do that! Okay, Lily, truth or dare?"

"I'm going with dare too."

"Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! I mean…. I won't be that evil. I dare you, Lily, to go up to Severus Snape tomorrow, and snog him. With tongue and everything."

James' eyes flashed with anger. His blood began to boil.

Lily looked like she wanted to puke.

"Let's get this over with. Alice, truth or dare?"

"I'm not going to be a chicken. I choose dare."

"Okay then. I have a good one, but your not gonna like it."

"Just tell me."

"You have to go get a bottle of firewhisky, (there's some under Sirius' bed.) bring up to the second year dorms, but it on Frank's bed side table, and, get into bed with him. He'll think that he got drunk, and, well, you get the point."

All the girls except Alice cracked up. Even the boys that were hiding on the staircase had to stop their laughter.

"Okay, I'm going to do this, just because I agreed to it, but know that I hate you." Alice said jokingly.

All the girls grinned, and got up.

Three of them went up the girls staircase, and one went up the boys staircase, unaware of the four boys that were racing her up to their dorm. 

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NEXT TIME: the dares are fulfilled! How will Frank react to Alice in his bed? Find out next time!

1:I don't know if Wizards know what CD's are, but we can pretend.  
2:I know that muggle appliances don't work at Hogwarts, but once again, we can pretend.

Thanx for reading! R&R please!


	12. Holy craparoni!

Hi ya peeps! 'Sup? I'm on my computer right now, and it's Halloween! Sorry for the long wait! I was/ am a little down right now. Because, something awful happened. I went to the eye doctor, because my eyes were really blot shot and irritated. Well, it turns out that the optical nerve in my eye is swollen, and is causing blood vessels to pop, and the doctor thinks it's all been caused because of a swelling in my brain. So, tomorrow, I et to go to the neurologist, and get a Cat scan and some other kind of scan on my brain. Not exactly the best news in the world. But, now that I've gone from petrified, to terrified, I shall write again! Waits for applause silence Um... onto the story?

Disclaimer: For what is now the 12th time, not mine.

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Chapter 12: Holy Craparoni!

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

A scream shook the castle.

Frank jumped out of bed.

"I- did- we-what-I-sorry-did we?" Frank stuttered.

Alice, mentally kicking herself, replied "I don't know! I don't remember anything!"

"Me neither!"

"Oh NO!" they cried in unison.

Sirius rushed in.

Laughing.

Hysterically. 

So, Frank assumed it was Sirius who had done this all. 

"Sorry you had to be on the end of Sirius' joke, Alice. See you later?"

Sirius had stopped laughing. He was mouthing wordlessly at Frank's assumption.

Alice, just wiped some fake tears fro her eyes, nodded and left.

As she walked past him, she stuck her tongue out at Sirius.

After she closed the door, she could hear what was going on inside.

"It wasn't me! I swear- ouch, Longbottom, that hurts!"

Laughing, Alice walked away. Smiling triumphantly, she went up to Lily.

"Your turn: Alice smirked.

Lily, who had previously been laughing, went silent, and paled considerably.

"Fine," she muttered darkly.

"Oh look, what good timing !" Steph squealed, as Snape walked down the hall.

Lily strode purposefully up to him, turned him around, and before she could back down, snogged him like he was the last boy on earth.

When they pulled apart, they looked at each other.

"Wow. Your lips are soft." They laughed as they spoke at the same time.

"Do you want to go for a walk?" Lily asked.

Snape and Lily looked equally shocked at this.

"Um... okay." Snape said, and they walked out of the building.

The rest of the group was silent before Steph spoke.

"Well. That was interesting. Parker, your dare!"

"Oh ya!" Parker exclaimed, and they ran back to the tower.

They were completely unaware of the very angry raven haired boy, that had watched the whole scene, and who had just decided that he hated Severus Snape. 

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(A/N: I considered just stopping, but I felt like making it go on a bit longer.)

Lily returned from her walk later that morning, to be greeted by VERY nosy friends.

She told them they only talked, which was met by three half disappointed, half relieved sighs.

The four of them went down to breakfast, Parker in her tutu and tiara, to be met with a very unpleasant scene.

There was James, pinning Severus up against the wall.  
Lily gave a strangles cry, and pushed James HARD. 

He fell, and watched from the floor as Lily helped Severus to an upright position.

James was in disbelief.

He got up, and ran as fast as he could.

Nobody saw him the rest of the day.

But, nobody noticed he was missing.

They were too busy gossiping about Lily and Severus, or laughing at Parker's attire, or talking about Steph's performance at breakfast.

FLASHBACK

"Albus, honey I think that you are at an age where you should know some things about you body." Steph started.

Albus muttered something that sounded either like "stupid truth or dare," or, "I like to eat chipmunks." Nobody could tell.

"Stephanie," Albus said, using Steph's first name, "I have gotten this talk about 200 times in my many years. I do not need it again. 20 points to Gryffindoor for the thought"

Steph breathed a sigh or relief.

The rest of the students were cracking up as she left.

END FLASHBACK

Later that evening, Sirius walked up to the dorm to find James writing furiously.

Sirius peered over his shoulder, and saw this.

HOW TO KILL SNAPE

1. Slit throat  
2. Shoot him  
3. Drown him  
4. Bury him alive  
5. Stuff fluffy down his throat ("Not Fluffy!" Sirius cried, holding the teddy bear.)  
6. Stab with sporks  
7. Pour water on him  
8. Wash his hair  
9. Decapitation  
10. Kill him (Pathetic..." Sirius muttered.)  
11. Put moldy cheese in his pumpkin juice  
12. Hit with baseball bat  
13. Make him play with dolls  
14. Pull his eyes out with a spoon. Maybe two, or even three spoons.  
15. Make him gallop through a field, with flowers up his nose.

This list went on until number 216.

Sirius shook his head sadly, took the piece of paper, wrote 'starvation' on it, then gave it back.

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Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! 

Anyway, hoped you like it! Again, it might be a while before I update, because I'll have massive headaches, and be in and out of the doctor's office/ hospital for a while. Stupid swollen brain... Okay, I'm gonna shut up now! Once again, I'm STILL in my search for a beta. Email me if you're interested!

Ta ta for now!

LIz


	13. Nightmares Or are they?

Hi ya peeps! 'Sup? Thankies to all that reviewed! YOU MADE MY WEEK SO MUCH BETTER! Well, besides that, my week sucked. I got surgery yesterday on my spine. Please review to make me feel better! You could also send virtual lollypops to my email! BTW, I am SO FRIGGEN SORRY! It's been like two weeks since I last updated! PLEASE FORGIVE ME! Anyway, what you've all been waiting for: the chapter.

Disclaimer: For what is now the 13th time, not mine.

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Chapter 13: Nightmares. Or are they?

Once upon a time, there were three best friends.

Their names were Zach, Ryan, and Jade.

They were inseparable.

Then, something happened that changed them forever.

Ryan and Jade fell in love.

Zach hated it. He was the third wheel.

So, he tried to break them up.

What he didn't understand was that you never try to break up two people who are in love.

Jade and Ryan were very angry with Zach.

They loved each other, and he was in their way.

So, they did the only thing that they could.

They killed Zach.

One freezing night, when the water in the pond had frozen, they took Zach out to the water.

Then, they pushed him in. His body broke the ice on impact.

He was drowning. He couldn't find a way out. All he could find was ice and water.

He couldn't breathe. He heard Ryan and Jade laughing as he struggled.

Oh, so this was all a joke. But, it wasn't funny. He wanted to get out.

He was panicking. Somebody, save him!

This wasn't a joke. His two best friends were killing him. They would pay.

Those were the last three words that Zach thought, before slipping into blackness.

Ryan and Jade were on the beach, laughing their heads off.

Murder was some kind of joke for them.

They never considered that he was their friend.

After about two hours, they got bored and decided to leave.

They ran back, having a race. It was all a big game.

By the time that they got back to town, however, Ryan noticed that Jade was missing.

He quickly retraced their steps. That was when he noticed something sparkling on the ground.

He walked over and picked it up. It was one of Jade's many bracelets.

The looked up. There was a small path, as if somebody had forced themselves threw the mess of bushes.

On the dirt floor, there were two sets of footprints. One looked as if they had been dragging something heavy. The other looked like they belonged to a person being dragged.

With a strangled cry, Ryan leapt up off of the ground. He ran as fast as he could. He needed to get away from that place.

He ran away. Not intending to ever tell anybody about it. Not intending to ever go back.

He was still alive. Even if Jade wasn't, he was. He was safe.

How wrong he was.

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Steph woke with a start.

It was just a dream. A nightmare.

Nothing bad was actually happening.

There was no Ryan. No Zach.

Her older sister, Jade, was only 15. She knew better than to kill somebody.

And, besides, her and Jade were best friends. Jade would tell her if she got a new boyfriend.

But, she hadn't heard from Jade in a long time.

Her older sister had promised to write to her every week.

She hadn't heard from Jade in almost three weeks.

'It's almost Christmas break. She's probably busy. Besides, Parker, Alice, Lily and I are spending break in the Leaky Caldron (sp?) I don't have time to worry about silly dreams.'

And with that, she went back to sleep.

She had no nightmares the rest of the night.

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BAM

"Ow… Alice! Get off of me! I'm sleeping." Lily mumbled.

"Wake up, hon! We're leaving for the Leaky Caldron today!" Alice exclaimed.

Lily groaned as she felt two more bodies collide with hers.

"Fine, fine. I'm getting up. Now everybody, get off me!"

Everybody laughed and got off of the aching Lily.

They all showered and got ready.

They walked down the stairs, all talking and laughing.

"So, what are you getting Snape for Christmas?" Parker asked nosily.

"First of all, his name is Severus. Second of all, I don't have any idea. You guys have to help me decide!" Lily said.

"So, Lily. I hear that you're going out with a ball of grease. Is it true?" James asked rudely.

"No. I'm going out with Severus, though. Not that that is ANY of your business, so I suggest you bug out." Lily snapped.

This is not what James was hoping for. He was hoping for a 'James you're right. Snape is a great ball of grease, and I'm dumping him. I love you!' kind of thing.

But NO, she just had to actually LIKE him! The nerve of her! Argh!

The rest of the marauders and the dream team watched the two in interest.

They knew that James wanted to snap back. But, to their surprise, he held his tongue, and walked away moodily.

Lily just shrugged and walked down the stairs.

'Hey, Siri!" She said when she reached the bottom. "Will you PLEASE give me piggy back ride?"

Sirius sighed. She always did this. Stupid puppy dog face…

"Fine, get on." He said, bending down.

Lily squealed happily, and got on. Sirius was strong, and she loved the feeling of being so high in the air.

And, as usual, as if to make fun of Sirius and Lily, Steph immediately climbed onto Remus' back, and they chased after them.

James sighed. How he wished Lily would ask him to do that. But, she wouldn't. He placed a smile on his face, and chased after his friends.

Later that afternoon, after the girls had arrived at the Leaky Caldron, they decided to go out for dinner.

After a while, Parker and Lily decided that they REALLY needed to go to the bathroom.

Parker got there first, and came out a minute later.

Lily rushed in, relieved herself, and was about to leave when she heard someone trying to open the door.

Lily heard Steph saying "Somebody's in there."

Just to be mean, Lily sat on the floor, and waited. She thought it would be funny to make that poor person suffer.

About five minutes later, Parker knocked on the door.

"Lily, honey, are you okay?" Parker asked concernedly.

Lily opened the door, and told Parker what she did.

"Lily! Tim had to tinkle!" Parker said.

"Tim?" Lily asked, confused.

"Yes, Tim. Or at least that's what his name tag said…"

"You mean he WORKED here!" Lily exclaimed.

"Yup. And this was his only break. And you denied him bathroom privileges."

"I didn't know that he worked here."

"Poor Tim. He's probably working here all day, to pay for his poor, sick, mother's medical bills, and this was his only break, and you denied him!"

"Shut it."

"Why don't you go tell Tim's poor, ill mother to shut it."

"Shut UP Parker!" Lily said. But, she was laughing.

And, from then on, Lily was teased about Tim.

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Okay, just to let you know, that part at the beginning was not pointless. It'll come up in other chapters, don't worry. And, I'm thinking, that after this break, I'll have them go back to school for maybe three chapters, then, I think I'll skip the rest of the year, and just send them to summer vacation. What do you think? Bad idea? And, I promise I'll update sooner next time! I'm ashamed! READ AND REVIEW! You know you want to.

Lovies,  
Liz


	14. Break ups' and MORE introductions!

Um…. Hi? Please don't hurt me? I have SO much homework, plus, I just didn't really feel like writing… SORRY! Anyway, here I am, updating . PLEASE REVIEW! Hehehehe… I'm really hyper! REVIEW OR FEAR MY AWSOME WRATH! Lol… NOW, I, YOUR LORD AND MASTER, COMMAND YOU TO GO LISTEN TO "who I am hates who I've been" by Relient K! IT IS SOOOOOO GOOD! NOW, ONTO THE CHAPTER!

Disclaimer: For what is now the 14th time, not mine. 

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Chapter 14: 'Break ups' and MORE introductions!

The girls were all sitting around in a circle, just talking. All of a sudden, Parker blurted out "Lily, really. What are you getting your boyfriend for Christmas?"

Lily laughed.

"Oh come on guys, I would never date Severus! He and I are only friends. I only said that we were dating because Potter was there!" She said, letting out another laugh.

Her friends sighed.

"He really likes you Lily. Why can't you call him James?" Alice asked.

"I know why!" Steph said suddenly.

"Really? Why then?" Parker asked.

"Because of this. Wait for it…" Steph said. "Here it comes…"

And with that, she quickly dove under the bed, as about 50 balloons filled with slime fell on the other girls.

The other girls screamed, covered head to foot in the slimy, wet, purple goo.

Steph came out from under the bed with an 'I told you so' kind of look.

"Steph, you can't POSSIBLY suspect the marauders of doing this! They're probably at home right now." Lily said skeptically.

"There you are wrong. Look to your right, por favor." Steph said.

"Since when do you speak Spanish?" Parker asked.

"Since never. Just look to your right!" Steph said impatiently.

The girls looked to their right. There they saw a large sign, exactly like the one that was on the train on their way to Hogwarts.

**Hi girls! It's us!  
**Ughh… Sirius, do you HAVE to ruin every one of these signs?  
**Umm… let me think…. Ya. I do. Deal with it Jamsie…  
**Sirius, do I NEED to remind you of what happened last time you called me Jamsie?   
**Um… Yes?**_  
_You. Are. An. Idiot.  
**Deal with it, mork. **  
What on EARTH is a mork?  
**It's a combination of moron and dork. Do you like it?  
**No.  
**That cuts me deep.  
**Good. **  
Well… you're a- a- a- um… Remus, help me!  
**_Could BOTH of you just shut up? _**  
No. Why would we do that?**  
_You guys are hopeless. **  
Hi. I'm Peter. **_**  
They know, idiot. **_  
OK, this poster is officially over. Bye girls!_

After the girls had stopped laughing, Steph began to speak.

"I saw them yesterday. They didn't see me, but they were saying something about 1:00. Which is now" Steph explained.

"Well, why didn't you tell us? Since you knew it was gonna happen and all?" Alice asked.

"I figured you wouldn't believe me when I told you, which you didn't, and so, I wanted you to pay for it!" Steph explained, letting out an evil laugh.

The other girls laughed and went to take showers.

Steph flopped onto the bed. After a few minutes, she became really tired. She closed her eyes, and drifted off.  
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Jade awoke with a towel across her face.

She pulled in off with sickening squelch.

She knew it wasn't water that was on the towel. But, she couldn't see what it was, because, the room was pitch black.

All of a sudden, some dull lights flickered on and a familiar voice reached her ears.

"Hello, my dear Jade. How nice to see you again. Right now, you probably have no idea who I am. Good. So, my dear Jade, how is it to be separated from your dear friend Ryan. You are alone, and quite helpless. No body knows where you are. You are probably wondering why I am doing this to you. Well, I know what you did to your so-called friend Zach. You had fun with that right? It was just a big game right? Well, now, I want to play. Sleep well, my dear Jade," the man said.

Jade knew that voice, but she couldn't figure out who it was. She panicked. She couldn't see her tormentor, no matter how hard she looked. 

She looked down at the sodden towel that was in her hands, and saw that it was completely soaked with somebody's blood.

She let out a scream, before her world went black once more. 

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Steph woke in a cold sweat.

Like before, however, she told herself that it was nothing, changed, and got ready to go out.

The girls entered the Leaky Cauldron, which was nearly empty.

They situated themselves around a table, and ordered their drinks. All of a sudden, four boys walked up to them. Alice gasped as she realized that one of them was Frank.

"Hey! What's up? My name's Ryan," said a very handsome boy. Ryan had short, platinum blonde hair, which was spiked up, and was died purple at the top. He had a gorgeous smile, which made his entire body scream happiness.

"I'm Brandon! How you doin'?" He asked jokingly. The girls laughed. Brandon had short, pitch black hair, and seemed like a very funny guy. He also appeared to be muggle-born, judging by how he knew the famous line from the show Friends.

"Hi ya! I'm Ben," said a tall boy. He had long, orange hair, and there was something that made him seem very unique. He also appeared to be muggle-born, as he was wearing a "My Chemical Romance" T-shirt.

"And, I'm hoping that you already know me. These are my friends, all second years. Ryan and Brandon are in Ravenclaw, and Ben is in Slytherin." Frank said.

The girls smiled at the handsome men, and introduced themselves.

"Hey we'll be right back, ok girls?" Frank asked.

The girls nodded. All of them, except Brandon left. Brandon sat at their table.

However, the girls didn't know realize he was still there.

"Hey, Lily. Ben looks kind of like Tim, don't you think?" Parker asked. 

"Would you guys just shut up about Tim?" Lily snapped.

"Who's Tim?" Brandon asked suddenly.

"No one…" Lily said. But, her friends were already explaining it to him.

"Don't worry Lily, I won't tell anybody. I'll just use it against you for the rest of forever! Bwahahahaha!" Brandon said.

Lily laughed. 

The rest of the boys came back.

"Um… there isn't enough room at the table is there?" Ben asked.

"You know what we have to do girls!" Steph said energetically.

"Aye-aye captain!" the girls replied.

They all got up and said "Have a seat, boys."

They boys, in awe, sat down. 

"But girls, we can't make you stand!" Ben said.

"Oh, but we won't be standing!" Parker said.

And, with that, they all went and sat on a boy's lap.

"Oh. I see now." Ben said. He was smiling, and seemed to be enjoying the fact that Steph was sitting on his lap.

The girls, who were enjoying themselves as well, laughed.

Then, something bad happened. 

The marauders walked through the door.

Sirius stopped in his tracks, and took in the sight.

There was Lily, a girl he considered practically his sister, sitting on some guy's lap. 

And, to make matters worse, they both seemed to be enjoying it.

The other marauders were all thinking 'What about Snape?'

But, of course, Sirius knew that Lily wasn't actually going out with him.

All he was concerned about was the fact that she was sitting on some guy's lap.

Of course, Lily caught his eye, and noticed immediately the angry glint that seemed to shine within them.

She hopped off of the guy's lap, and ran toward Sirius.

"Um… hi? Sorry?" Lily said.

"Lily, is this guy your boyfriend? If so, I'm so sorry!" The boy said.

"Oh, no, Brandon, Sirius isn't my boyfriend. More like my brother." Lily explained.

Brandon gulped.

"Um… see you at school Lily!" He said, and fled from the store.

"You have some explaining to do Lily!" Sirius said in a very cheesy way. 

"Um… so do you…." Lily said. He noticed that she was looking at his pants.

He looked down. There was a large wet spot, and it made it look like he wet himself.

He immediately turned to James.

But, James was sitting down on a stool, looking extremely confused and upset.

Then, he heard muffled laughter coming from the table.

He turned.

There was a purple haired boy, with his wand out, and was muffling his laughter in Parker's back.

Sirius glared at him a moment, before taking Lily's drink, and starting a full blown water fight with it.

By the end, James was the only one who wasn't soaking, and who wasn't smiling. 

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It's only 1,500 words, but, it's still the longest chapter yet! Did you love it? Did you hate it? TELL ME! REVIEW! Pretty please with sugar on top? Just do it! It's not that hard! REVIEW!


	15. After Break

Hi ya peeps! 'Sup? I know, you're probably all ready to kill me… but, it's not my fault! I just posted this new story, and I've been getting WAY more reviews on it than on this, and so, I've been working harder to get it updated. Anyway, here I am, updating! Anyway, this is IMPORTANT! I will be doing one more chapter after this of year one. Then, it's into summer vacation, and then into second year. The next chapter WILL be the last one while they are first years! Enjoy! Oh ya, and, I want you to tell me your opinion on something. Should year two be a different story? Like a sequel? Or should it continue in this? YOU TELL ME!

Disclaimer: For what is now the 15th time, not mine.

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Chapter 15: After Break

Christmas came and went, and soon, break was over, and the gang was heading back to school.

James was smiling again, and Sirius was no longer on a warpath.

Anyway, they were all sitting around on the train, in the same compartment on their way back from school.

Lily was just sitting around and eating vanilla pudding from those nifty cool little pudding cups, and listening to one of her favorite bands, 15 minutes late.

She looked out the window, and saw an owl flapping around. She quickly opened the window and grabbed it.

She saw that it had a lily (how original) and a note attached to it.

Dear Lily,

Hello! Don't you think Dear is a little formal? I don't like it, but I put it on there anyway. Anyway, how are you? I didn't dare come talk to you during the rest of break, just in case Sirius was there, which I bet he was. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that I'm three compartments down from you, if you wanted to step out and see the four of us for a little while. Hope to see you soon!

-Brandon

She laughed quietly to herself. She liked his handwriting. She quickly wrote a letter back to him.

Dear Brandon,

Hi! Yes, I think dear is a little formal too. And, you were right, Sirius didn't stop tailing me all break. He even tried to come into the ladies washroom with me! Yes, thanks for letting me know that you are so close. I'll try to sneak out. I have a plan, and if it works, I should be there in about ten minutes. See you soon!

-Lily

She sent the letter back with the owl. To her surprise, there was another owl waiting there. She pulled it inside, and it flew over to Parker. The boys were watching suspiciously, but weren't saying anything. Probably because Lily put a silencing spell on them.

Parker read her letter, looked up at Lily, and they exchanged letters.

Hello, My dear Playground.

Yes, I know you hate it when I call you that. You're probably plotting my death right now. Anyway, I just wanted to say that we are three compartments down, so, stop by if you get the chance. Oh ya and Frank wants you to invite Alice. And now, apparently, judging by the way he's chanting "ask her, ask her, ask her!" Ben wants you to invite Steph. I think Brandon already sent Lily a letter. But, I don't know, because he's staring dreamily into space and won't answer us right now. So, if he didn't, invite Lily along too. Maybe she can snap Brandon out of his stupor. Hoping to see you soon!

-Ryan

Lily read Ryan's large, cursive scrawl, and laughed at his very effective joke about PARKer's name.

She waited for Parker to write her reply, before writing a note that explained her plan. Parker shared the note with Alice and Steph, and soon the plan was in motion.

They un-silenced the boys. They played a game of exploding snap. Then, Lily spoke.

"I'm going to the bathroom. NO, Sirius, I'm perfectly able to go by myself, thank you." She stood and left.

"You know, I have to go too. Too much orange juice this morning. Be right back." Parker explained. She too left.

"You know, I'm hungry. Wanna come to the front of the train to get food with me, Alice?" Steph stood.

"Sure. I'm kind of hungry too." And without another word, the two of them left.

The four girls met up out side of the compartment, laughing.

"That was good. Let's go." Parker laughed.

So, they all went and walked three compartments away from their own. And stumbled upon a group of rather unhappy Slytherins.

"Um…. I'm guessing they meant three compartments down THE OTHER WAY!" Lily said as they ran.

They finally found the right compartment.

The girl stumbled into the compartment, laughing their heads off.

Although they didn't know what was so funny, the boys started laughing too.

"So, how was your break?" Brandon asked Lily as she stepped in.

"It was fine. Thanks for the gift, all four of you." Lily said, fingering the necklace with a small lily flower on it, that they had given her.

"Yeah, thanks." The other four girls coursed. The boys had given each of them a necklace as well.

Alice and Frank were off in a corner talking about one thing or another within a few minutes.

Lily and Brandon were playing checkers, being as they were both muggle born.

Steph was talking to Ben about his move. You see, Ben used to live in America, but moved here, because there wasn't a wizarding school in America. He missed his parents, who had stayed in America, but was enjoying it here very much.

And Parker had taken her place back on Ryan's lap. They both looked as though they were very… happy… with their current positions. If you know what I mean.

Suddenly the compartment door banged open in a cloud of smoke.

Lily felt herself being hoisted onto someone's strong, broad shoulders.

Even though she couldn't see a thing, she knew it wasn't Sirius; his shoulders were much narrower.

The smoke cleared, and she saw a mess of brown, messy hair. Oh, so she was on Potter's back.

She knew that she hated him, but she also knew that his back was very comfortable.

She rested her head on his head of soft, well conditioned, and very good smelling hair, and felt very content.

Suddenly, she realized something. This was POTTER!

She struggled to get off.

"Should we let them go, Sirius?" James asked.

"No. Not in their lifetime." Sirius said, rather serious at the moment.

"Aye-aye Captain!" James said brightly, and made sure he had a good grip on Lily.

Lily looked around. For the first time, she realized that she was on James' back, not Sirius'.

She whipped her head around. Parker was on Sirius' back. And she was NOT happy about it.

"Let. Me. GO!" She kept repeating over and over. But he wasn't. As a matter of fact, he was smiling to himself.

Very confused, and not caring that this was James Potter, the boy she loathed, she put her head back on his, and somehow fell asleep, with the last thought of "Wow. It's taking a long time to move three compartments. I wonder where we're going."

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Hi! Um… did you like it? Okay, I won't be updating until after Christmas. Surprise, surprise. BUT, I will more than likely be updating next week, cuz IT'S CHRISTMAS BREAK, AND I'VE GOT NOTHING TO DO! Woo and Hoo! See you when I see you! R&R!


	16. Robert, the Little Green Man

Hi ya peeps! 'Sup? HAPPY NEW YEARS! I'm excited to get this party started! And, I'd love to thank you all for reviewing! Whenever I ask for reviews, you rise to the occasion magnificently! I LOVE YOU ALL!

Disclaimer: For what is now the 16th time, not mine.

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Chapter 16: Robert, the Little Green Man

Somehow, the girls weren't yelling about the incident.

Lily was still confused about Sirius, Parker was too furious to speak, Steph wasn't angry (she had rather enjoyed the being on Remus' back.) and Alice was missing. She probably kicked Peter's butt and went back to Frank.

Oh well. The compartment was silent.

Sirius had fallen asleep, Remus and Steph were attempting to communicate telepathically, Lily was daydreaming, Parker was still silently seething, Peter was probably off bleeding in the hallways or something, and James was staring dreamily at Lily, and blushing madly.

Suddenly Sirius sat up, fully awake. "Let's play Go Fish!" he said.

Everybody looked at him oddly.

"And we can bet candy!" Sirius said, bouncing up and down. At the mention of candy, everybody got in the game.

"Got any threes?" Sirius asked James.

"Nope." James said smiling. Sirius frowned and started to cry.

Everyone scooted away from him. "Um… okay then…. Got any twos?" James asked Remus.

"No, go fish." Remus said.

James looked on the verge of tears himself as he drew a card. "HA! FISH MY WISH! FISH MY WISH!" James yelled at Remus.

Remus sighed. "Okay then. Go again. This game does weird things to people…" Remus muttered the last part.

"Got any aces?" James asked Lily, now completely composed.

"No." Lily replied. James drew a card. He frowned.

"I DIDN'T FISH MY WISH!" He wailed. He grabbed Lily's arm, and began to sob uncontrollably.

"Okay then… this game died." Lily said. She grabbed the candy and ran.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Everybody in the compartment cried.

Lily was very scared.

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It was a few months later, and the last night of school.

"As a special treat, and to exercise some school unity, we will all be sleeping in the Great Hall tonight." Dumbledore announced.

Everybody jumped excitedly at this.

Later that night, they all met in the Great Hall in their pajamas. The boys were wearing comfortable T-shirts, and sweat pants. They looked really good. The girls were all wearing a black spaghetti strap tank top, with baggy, low rise pajama bottoms that matched their eyes. They looked really good too.

They went and found a spot for all of them to 'sleep.'

"Let's stay up all night!" Sirius suggested. The others agreed.

(Four hours, two pizzas, and three bags of candy later…)

Everybody was cracking up. It was hilarious! They didn't know exactly what 'It' was, but that's okay! It was funny anyway.

"Hey James." Sirius managed to gasp out. "What?" James asked.

"Smooth banana." Sirius cracked up again. James eyes bulged.

"WHAT!" He asked.

"Nice hotdog." Sirius answered.

Lily started laughing too. "Sirius. They don't know about Robert." Lily said. Then she laughed so hard she cried.

"Who's Robert?" Parker asked.

Sirius suddenly got very Sirius.

"First of all, Robert wants you to know that you are one foxy mama. Second, Robert is the little green man who lives inside my head. His name used to be Man. Then he got a sex change, so how he's Robert."

He and Lily laughed so hard that they turned blue. Sirius whispered something to Lily. She laughed again, and turned to James.

"Robert wants me to tell you… Dirty Rabbits." She said, finally letting out the laughter that she had been holding in to speak.

This went on for quite a while, with more phrases such as "Weird grandpa, hot bumblebees, big boys, important macaroni, wet Ronald McDonald, creepy teletubies, juicy Jell-O, shiny airplanes, wild homework, old grapes, tasty raccoons, cute oatmeal, clean squirrels, and fat Raggedy Ann."

(Two hours, six more slices of pizza, and ten bags of candy later)

James and Sirius were sitting with their backs against a wall in a corner, laughing manically, sanity completely lost. Lily was lying across both of their laps, cracking up for no reason. Steph and Remus were FINALLY able to communicate telepathically and were having a conversation about quills. Frank was braiding Alice's hair, and she was getting ready to do his nails. Parker seemed to be having a conversation with herself.

The next day, everyone was tired, and completely loopy. Sirius, James, and Lily cracked up every time they saw each other. Alice's hair was braided, and Frank's nails were purple. Steph and Remus hardly said anything to each other, but would randomly say things like "I totally agree." Parker was seen having a very heated argument… with herself…

They got on the train. When the train stopped, Lily ran to say good bye to her friends.

She gave Sirius a HUGE hug, and said goodbye.

She went over to Remus and gave him a hug too. Then, she looked very concentrated for a second. He looked surprised. "I've been practicing telepathy," She explained. He laughed.

She went over to Peter. She didn't give him a hug. "Try to grow a little over the summer." She laughed. He blushed.

She got to James.

"Keep using that shampoo. It smells good." She smiled. James smiled too. She gave him a quick hug, then said good bye to the rest of her friends.

She began walking away.

"Wait! Flower! Where are you staying?" James asked tentatively, using his nickname for her.

Lily frowned slightly. "I found a place. See you next year." She waved and ran off before they could question her again.

The rest of the friends said goodbye, and departed, leaving Sirius there waiting for his parents by himself.

Within a half and hour, he was the only one on the platform, and the only sound was of the Hogwarts Express zooming away.

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As you'll see in the next chapter, I edited the timeline a bit. Can you guess what'll happen to Sirius? What about where Lily is? I'll update again when I get 7 reviews. BTW, all of the funny stuff I this chapter ACTUALLY happened when I was at a sleepover. When your best friend and her brother have a sleepover/party on the same night, things get interesting…


	17. The Adventures of James and Pizza

Um... sorry? UGH! I HAD THE WORST WRITERS BLOCK EVER! And, I was finishing another story, starting a new one, and starting a new semester. I'm really, really, really , really sorry. I PROMISE that I'll update AS SOON as I get 7 reviews.

Disclaimer: For what is now the 17th time, not mine.

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Chapter 17: The adventures of James and pizza

DING DONG.

The doorbell made Jame's walls shake. He ran to the door. He opened it, and got a big shock. Standing in the pouring rain, was Sirius. His black hair was hanging into his eyes, and he was shivering madly.

"C-c-can I borrow a coat?" Sirius asked, teeth chattering.

"No! Come in here right no!" James ordered, getting over the shock quickly. Sirius obeyed.

"I'm not going to bother with detail right now. Bathroom is upstairs and two doors to the left. Go take a hot bath. I'll have the house elf bring up dry clothes. Don't look at me like that, just do it!" James ordered.

Sirius looked at him oddly. "Oh-kay..." He said. He darted up the stairs. 20 minutes later, he came downstairs, drying his hair with a towel, and wearing some of James' clothes.

"Here. Have some hot chocolate. And here's dinner. You look like you haven't eaten in AGES!" James said.

Sirius grabbed the food gratefully, and refrained from commenting on James' sudden motherly demeanor.

"Thanks mate." He said.

"No prob. I called my parents. They say you can stay here." James said, his casual face back on.

"Aren't you going to ask what happened?" Sirius questioned.

"Nope, it's not important. Look, I'm tired, you're tired, let's go to sleep." James said. Sirius gaped and followed James upstairs.

"This is the guest bedroom. You can stay here. The walls morph depending on your personality, it's pretty cool." James said.

Sirius gaped. It had black walls, with white, star-like dots covering it. "Thanks again."He said.

James grinned. "Just go to sleep." Sirius hopped onto the bed, and instantly obliged to James' order.

James smiled, and left the room, happy to have helped his best friend.

"Good morning sunshine!" Sirius yelled as he burst into James' room.

"Go jump off a cliff..." James muttered sleepily.

"No way! You wanna show me around town?" Sirius asks excitedly.

"Fine... let me get dressed at least!" James demanded. Sirius quickly dropped his arm, gave his a thumbs up, and skipped from the room.

20 minutes later, they were on their way out the door. James was pointing out random things. Although he had a completely magical family, they lived in a muggle town. (A/N: Don't ask. I just decided it.)

"And that's Brandon's house... Why does he have to live near me?" James muttered angrily at the large house. Suddenly, as they were passing it, they heard a familiar laugh. The two boys froze and whirled around. There was Brandon, smiling and goofy as ever. And then, standing next to him was a smiling, green eyed, red haired Lily Evans.

"No. Way." James whispered, fire shooting up in his eyes.

Sirius ran a hand through his long black hair. "Agreed..."

Then Lily saw them. She froze, went wide eyed and a blush slowly crept up her face.

"Ummmm... hi?" She waved meekly.

"How's your summer going?" Brandon asked cheerfully.

He quickly shut his mouth as he saw Sirius and James' angry faces.

"Lily! Save yourself!" He yelled. Then, he grabbed her hand, and they made a beeline for the house.

Half an hour later, Brandon and Lily were inside, making mini pizzas, thinking they were safe. They had a HUGE pile of them on a plate. Suddenly, James and Sirius barged through the door, looking very pathetic. They took one look around, and made a beeline for the pizza. Sirius started eating his, while James did a very different thing.

He began hitting Brandon over and over with the pizza. It was quite interesting, seeing a boy getting beat up by a pizza. Finally, when Brandon was covered in a bunch of random pizza ingredients, James stopped. He dropped the pizza on the floor, and stepped in it triumphantly. Sirius crawled over and ate it off the floor. It was gross.

Lily was on the floor by now, cracking up. That was the weirdest thing that she had ever seen. And as she looked at the boys, Sirius stuffing pizza in his mouth as fast as possible, James glaring at Brandon, and Brandon looking up at him, grinning, completely covered in random things, she knew that it would be and VERY odd summer.

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Yup, again, that actually happened to me and my friends. Very interesting, really. I'm cured of writer's block, and have a zillion million ideas, and will put them down on the computer as soon as I get 7 reviews!


	18. Why Brandon? And Snape's Hair

Hi ya peeps! 'Sup? Sorry it took me so long to update, I was on vacation. And I had no computer. Lol. Anyway, thanks for your WONDERFUL reviews on the last chapter! They all made me smile!

Dedication: Amberhawk. You rock my socks off. A lot. I love you and your review. I cracked up for like 15 minutes. Really, I did. Also, the last part of this chapter is dedicated to terri cooper. Thanks for the idea!

Disclaimer: For what is now the 18th time, not mine.

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Chapter 18: Why Brandon? And Snape's hair.

That night, after Brandon got cleaned up, they all went to bed. James and Sirius refused to leave. Actually, Brandon's mother had invited them to stay after she got there.

-8- Flashback-8-

Brandon's mom walked through the door to the odd sight. Brandon's twin sister, named Brittany, gaped.

"Mom... why does Brandon look like he rolled around in a pizza factory?" Brittany asked.

"I really don't know... who are you boys?" Brandon's mom asked James and Sirius.

"James Potter and Sirius Black. They're... friends of Lily's..." Brandon answered for them.

Brandon's mom sighed. "I'm guessing that you didn't tell them that you were staying here, did you."

Lily blushed and shook her head. "No ma'am."

Brandon's mom sighed again. "Stop calling me ma'am! You make me sound old!" She smiled and laugh. "So, boys. I'm guessing that you don't approve of Lily staying here, do you?"

James and Sirius made to protest, but Brandon's mom stopped them. "No, it's okay. You stay here too! The more the merrier! You can share Brandon's room!" She said smiling.

James and Sirius shrugged and agreed.

-8- End Flashback-8-

So, James and Sirius were now sitting outside Lily and Brittany's room, glaring. The door was open, but the lights were off. It was very late. There was a loud thunk as Sirius fell asleep, and in the process, rolled down the stairs. But James was in his own world.

Why was Lily staying with Brandon instead of Sirius or Remus? Instead of him... Or Stephanie, or Alice, or Parker! She could have stayed with any of them... why Brandon? Besides that, whatever happened to Snape? WHY BRANDON!

Sirius climbed back up the stair, groaning.

"Ouch, James, that hurt! Why didn't you stop me?" Sirius exclaimed quietly.

"'Cause you're a loser." James replied.

Sirius glared and stuck his tongue out at him.

"So boys, what's going on?" Brittany's voice filled the hallway.

"AAAAAHHHHH!" The two boys yelled.

"Shh... you'll wake everyone up!" Brittany cried.

The boys quieted. Brittany looked completely different from Brandon. Brandon was medium height and very skinny. Brittany was also medium height, but looked healthier than Brandon, as she didn't look like a stick figure. While Brandon had short black hair, and darker eyes, Brittany had mocha colored hair, going down past her shoulders, and teal eyes. She was currently wearing a tank top and a pair of baggy pajama pants, with her hair done up in a messy bun.

"So, James is in love with Lily..." She said.

"WHAT!" Sirius yelped.

James stayed bowed his head. "How did you know?"

"Hello! In case you didn't notice, I AM a girl! Girls know this kind of thing." Brittany said as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.

James looked up, appearing frantic. "DOES THAT MEAN LILY KNOWS?" He yelled.

Brittany rubbed her ear. "She does now..."

Sirius laughed. And rolled down the stairs again.

This time he made much more of a racket, and Lily came running out of the room, looking a mess.

"What's wrong? What happened? Where's Sirius? Why... why are you all sitting here?" She calmed down and looked around suspiciously at them, Sirius climbing back up the stairs again.

"Look! A distraction!" James yelled.

Lily gaped at him. She turned to Brittany. "Has he gone mental?"

Brittany nodded. But when Lily turned back to look at James, he was gone. Lily shook her head, and went back to bed.

The next day, Lily and Brittany went for a walk. As they were walking along, laughing, Brittany's friend stuck her head out of a car window and yelled "HI BRITTANY!"

Brittany yelled hi back, and turned to Lily who was cracking up.

"What's so funny?" Brittany asked.

"For a second... I don't know why... But I thought that was Remus!" Lily laughed.

"What? Why would REMUS stick his head out of a car window and yell at me?" Brittany asked.

"I dunno..."

"You know what I think?"

"What?"

"I think that James and Sirius are having a secret love affair."

Lily laughed. "Where on earth did THAT come from!"

Brittany laughed as well. "I have absolutely NO idea..."

"But what about James and Remus? I always thought that THEY were having a secret love affair." Lily replied.

"Well, they are." Brittany replied.

"How can they all be having love affairs?" Lily asked.

"This is how it's happening. James and Sirius are having a not-so-secret love affair, but James is secretly cheating on Sirius with Remus!" Brittany replied.

"I can see that. You know what would be funny? If James and Sirius were making out in a random bush, and then Sirius heard what we said, and started beating James up." Lily said.

"That would be hilarious!" Brittany agreed.

Little did they know, James and Sirius WERE hiding in a bush. But they weren't making out. I hope. James sighed and leaned up against the bush.

"Perfect. I fall in love with a girl, and she thinks I'm gay..."

Sirius had developed an odd reaction to James loving Lily... every time he mentioned it, Sirius would beat James up. So part of Lily and Brittany's prediction came true... spooky.

It was a few days later when Brandon invited Ben over. And Ben brought Snape. James sat in a corner and glared while Sirius ran around, making odd noises, pretending to be an airplane (Who gave him the sugar!) and Lily, Brandon, Ben, Snape, and Brittany sat around in a circle laughing.

"Heh heh... I have a fun game to play!" Lily exclaimed.

"What is it?" Snape questioned.

"It's called 'Let's wash Severus' hair'" Lily smirked.

"NOOOOOOO!" Snape screamed at the group nodded and dragged him along.

"YES!" They all screamed in unison.

They dragged him into the bathroom, and over to the sink.

"What shampoo do you have Brittany?" Ben asked.

"I have rose scented shampoo! Can we use that?" She asked.

The group yelled "YES!" at the same time as Snape yelled "NO!"

But they did it any way.

After they were finished, Snape looked... kinda good...

His long hair had straightened after the grease had been worn away, and Lily had cut his hair in layers (who knew she could cut hair?) It reached a little past his ears, and hung in his eyes a bit.

"Gr... you ruined me!" Snape cried.

Lily got down next to him, so their noses were nearly touching. "No, we enhanced you. You look much more hygienic now."

Snape smiled a little, and didn't say another word.

They all got up off the floor, grabbed the sugar high Sirius, and began doing his make-up just for the heck of it. But James didn't join in. His mind was focused on an image of Lily, kneeling down next to Snape, her hands on his knees, and her small nose nearly touching his large one...

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Sorry the update took so long this time! But I still hope you liked it! I'm aiming for 9 reviews before I update! R&R!


	19. AN

**A/N: **Sorry, dear readers, this is _not_ a chapter. I am sad to say that I am _leaving_ fanfiction. My life has gotten really hectic, and I have really just lost interest. Also, when I started fanfiction, it was just a fun pastime. Then, I found that I really LOVE to write. I tried writing a few stories of my own, and I realized that I write just as well, if not better, with my own characters. So, I've stopped writing fanfiction so that I can focus on other things. I'm really, really sorry.

BUT, whether the story ends here or not is up to you. I'm going to choose one person to take over the story for me. Requirements are:

You have to have written at least one romance story in the past.

You have to stick to the pairings that I have chosen.

You have to update relatively quickly.

You cannot have more than 2 other long running stories going at the same time.

I know that these are a lot of requirements, but I want to leave this story in good hands. Please PM me (don't put it in a review) if you're interested. Put your name and age on the message, as well as why you want to take over the story. I will announce to the readers who has won after I pick. If nobody applies, or I don't like the ones that do apply, the story _will end here_. I am not going to continue it. It's up to you.

Once again, I'm sorry for leaving. Really, I am.


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